I used to love the weekends, until…….until grief entered my life. Then, the weekends became a time of drudgery, and a time of more sadness and sorrow…….a time when the hours just seemed to linger on and on and time seemed to stand still. At least during the week I was kept busy!
That is the cry of many people who find themselves in need of “a healing place”….. a place that is a reprieve from pain and sadness and reminders of what has been lost. We generally associate the weekends with “time off”, “family time”, “sleeping in”, “taking mini one-day vacations”, or just “hanging out around the house killing time.” For the griever, none of these things are appealing, nor do they help!
What does help? What can I do on the weekend that will help me to heal and not hurt? First of all, have a plan. Not having a plan is planning to fail. Be sure to have something in mind: taking a walk, watching a movie, taking a drive in the car……..it’s always good to “do something” no matter how little that something is.
Secondly, be sure to surround yourself with lots of positives……positive photos, positive readings, postive music……things that will give you a healing message. The more we think about pain, the more the pain will intensify. And, on a better note, the more we think about positive things, the more positive we will feel. We can have a choice in this matter, and for the grieving person, this bit of “control” is significantly important!
Thirdly, remember that “this, too, shall pass.” The weekends will always be here, but the loneliness from loss won’t last forever. There will come a day when you will not feel so alone or so empty. If you have to, write that thought down on paper, and put that reminder in key places throughout the house where you can see it, read it, and hold that thought deep within your subconscious mind.
Finding a healing place is a task that every grieving person faces, and that place will be different for everyone. Do what is best for “you” and by doing so, your grief will not overtake you. By having a weekend plan, you also have a weekend place of healing!
What am I doing this weekend? What else……working in my flower beds. That is my weekend plan for a healing place!